The Clown Car Update for September 13, 2020

Posted: September 13, 2020 in New Post

Who is pulling Joe Biden’s strings? That was the big question when Laura “Eva Braun” Ingraham interviewed a dementia-ravaged lunatic also known as the Conspirator-in-Chief, Donald J. Trump. And this interview was epic for Donald because he has uncovered so many plots against him launched from the “shadows” that Willam Barr had to put the full force of the Justice Department in search of black-cloaked men “fully geared up!” on a certain flight from a certain city!

Needless to say, all this attention on the Antifa squad is making travel very difficult for anarchists and trouble-makers of all stripes to move around the country to deliver their lethal fusillade of soup bags on unsuspecting MAGAs. So, as always, the Clown Car to the rescue. Announcing the brand new airline, Antifa Air, the way to get to your protest destination with all your soup cans and Improvised Epicurian Delights or IED’s. So gear up and come aboard because we will fly you there.

We offer flexible ticket pricing so we can fit any anarchist budget:

First Class: Our first-class seating includes soup can holders for each passenger as well as internet connectivity. So stretch out in our luxurious reclining seats and don’t miss a single manifesto. Stay in touch with George Soros, Hillary Clinton, AOC, other Antifa leaders. And First Class seating includes in-flight meals prepared by our world-famous satanic chefs. Bon appetite!

Business Class: Our business class seating affords you the flexibility to change destinations mid-flight in case you need to attend an emergency meeting with your soup suppliers at an undisclosed pizza shop somewhere in a radical left city. Antifa Air knows how important it is to keep your soup supply lines flowing. You never want to depend on throwing bricks because as President Trump has indicated, you can’t throw a brick. It’s too heavy but a can of soup, you can really put some power into that!

Coach: With COVID-19 we are all on a tight budget and Atifa Air is sensitive to your need to get to your protest on time to deliver your barrage of soup. Coach is the way to go. We offer unlimited destinations for Coach because we never land for coach customers. Instead, we drop you from our cargo bay with world-class parachutes for both you and up to five bags of soup. So take advantage of our Coach Class and rain in on your next protest like a Russian hooker!

So put on your black-ops tees, pack your soup slingshots, and slip on your ski masks because Antifa Air will get you there. And we take all major credit cards and will cash George Soros checks. And remember our motto: At Antifa Air, we deliver the soup!”

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