The Clown Car Update for May 7, 2017

Posted: May 5, 2017 in New Post

425

On Episode 425 of The Tim Corrimal Show, it was another crazy week in the White house briefing room. This week Mick Mulvaney and Sean Spicer tried to convince us that tax breaks for billionaires are really health care, republicans care about the poor, and chain link fences are really walls.  And in watching that Alice-In-Wonderland extravaganza, I was reminded of one of my favorite Sesame Street exercises, One Of These Things Is Not Like the Other. So I thought it would be fun to play that game with ten questions from this week in Trumpland. Keep your score on the honor system and we will give you the results at the end.

Let’s play “One Of These Things Is Not Like the Other: Trump Edition”

Question #1:

  1. Viagra
  2. Cialis
  3. Levitra
  4. Paul Ryan

Three are drugs to make your dick hard. One is a big prick.

Question #2:

  1. Abraham Lincoln
  2. Franklin Roosevelt
  3. John F. Kennedy
  4. Donald Trump

Three were presidents who led America through a crisis. One is a crisis.

Question #3:

  1. Medicare
  2. Medicaid
  3. Obamacare
  4. American Health Care Act

Three are health care plans for the old, sick, and poor, one is a plan for fat old men to have a beer party in the Rose Garden.

Question #4:

  1. Bird shit
  2. Elephant shit
  3. Cow shit
  4. Donald Trump

This was a trick question. They are exactly the same thing.

Question #5

  1. Bachelor of Science
  2. Master of Science
  3. PhD
  4. First grade

Three are college earned degrees. The other is the speech level of the current president of the United States.

Question #6

  1. The Russian President
  2. The Russian Prime Minister
  3. The Russian Ambassador
  4. The President of the United States

Three are Russian officials working out of the Kremlin. One is a Russian official working out of the White House.

Question #7

  1. Brad Pitt
  2. Jennifer Lawrence
  3. Anne Hathaway
  4. Michael Flynn

Three have vanity license plates. One will soon be making license plates.

Question #8

  1. A urinal
  2. A toilet bowl
  3. The men’s room floor
  4. Donald Trump

Another trick question. All four get pissed on.

Question #9

  1. John Wilkes Booth
  2. Lee Harvey Oswald
  3. Mark David Chapman
  4. Steve Bannon

Three are assassins. One is an ass.

Question #10

  1. A snake
  2. A cat
  3. A Opossum
  4. Kelly Ann Conway

Three are hissing, one is a missing!.

So, let’s see how you did. If you kept your score at home, here are the results:

0 – 2 Comatose. You really do think a fence is a wall and that your hubcap collection is worth a fortune.

3 – 5 Barely awake. A brain scan would probably reveal cat litter.

6 – 8 Good, but still wondering how you could have missed between two and four of these. Maybe it’s just Trump fatigue.

9 – 10 Excellent. You probably voted for Hillary and are now realizing that we are all screwed!

I hope you all did well, and remember, one of these is better not be like the other: 2010, 2014. 2016. and 2018. Why? Because unlike the first three, in 2018, we take back our country!

 

 

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