The Bible and Other Phil Robertson Violent Fantasies

Posted: March 29, 2015 in New Post

This week, self-described prophet and killer of innocent ducks once again shared his thoughts with the world. This time he chose to share his fantasy of raping and dismembering women in front of their husband and father.  Well, that’s if the family was full of atheists. According to Phil, the only thing stopping him or anyone from living out this obsession is the Good Book and Jesus. Otherwise, lock your doors when you hear a duck call.

Now I can’t be too sure if Phil ever cracked that book open for a moment and actually read what is in it. But I took the opportunity to scan it briefly and found this nugget that sounds eerily like Phil’s fantasy.  I found this passage on It’s from Judges 19:16-29:

16 That evening an old man from the hill country of Ephraim, who was living in Gibeah (the inhabitants of the place were Benjamites), came in from his work in the fields. 17 When he looked and saw the traveler in the city square, the old man asked, “Where are you going? Where did you come from?”

18 He answered, “We are on our way from Bethlehem in Judah to a remote area in the hill country of Ephraim where I live. I have been to Bethlehem in Judah and now I am going to the house of the Lord.[a] No one has taken me in for the night. 19 We have both straw and fodder for our donkeys and bread and wine for ourselves your servants—me, the woman and the young man with us. We don’t need anything.”

20 “You are welcome at my house,” the old man said. “Let me supply whatever you need. Only don’t spend the night in the square.” 21 So he took him into his house and fed his donkeys. After they had washed their feet, they had something to eat and drink.

22 While they were enjoying themselves, some of the wicked men of the city surrounded the house. Pounding on the door, they shouted to the old man who owned the house, “Bring out the man who came to your house so we can have sex with him.”

23 The owner of the house went outside and said to them, “No, my friends, don’t be so vile. Since this man is my guest, don’t do this outrageous thing. 24 Look, here is my virgin daughter, and his concubine. I will bring them out to you now, and you can use them and do to them whatever you wish. But as for this man, don’t do such an outrageous thing.”

25 But the men would not listen to him. So the man took his concubine and sent her outside to them, and they raped her and abused her throughout the night, and at dawn they let her go. 26 At daybreak the woman went back to the house where her master was staying, fell down at the door and lay there until daylight.

27 When her master got up in the morning and opened the door of the house and stepped out to continue on his way, there lay his concubine, fallen in the doorway of the house, with her hands on the threshold. 28 He said to her, “Get up; let’s go.” But there was no answer. Then the man put her on his donkey and set out for home.

29 When he reached home, he took a knife and cut up his concubine, limb by limb, into twelve parts and sent them into all the areas of Israel.

To sum up, a kind, god fearing old man, a believer, offers a traveler, another believer, the comfort of his home. He is rewarded by having his traveler’s wife taken by a mob, raped all night, and left dead on his doorstep in the morning, Then, the traveler takes her corpse home, dismembers it, and mails her body parts all over Israel. What makes this story even uglier, if that’s possible,  is that later God organizes an army with sharp swords and slings and a war ensues!

Wow. Phil, that’s some book you keep waving in our noses. I guess you read those stories to your children at bedtime?  It would explain a lot.  One thing your good book does illustrate is that evil can strike anyone, believer or non-believer. Evil is an equal opportunity psychopath.  How do I know, Phil? The bible tells me so!

  1. Johnny Coles says:

    I’m a member of The Tri-County Benghazi Investigation Committee. It’s a Facebook parody group. The other day one of my real life friends posted a photo of the duck guy and said she completely agreed with everything he said. I didn’t notice it was her ’cause I thought it was one of the parody postings. I commented “get that duck out’ta yer pants”. I think all my friends are crazy. LOL

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