The GOP Clown Car Update for November 9, 2014

Posted: November 9, 2014 in New Post

This week on Episode 315 of The Tim Corrimal Show we discussed the curious strategy of democrats all over the country running their campaigns as if they did not belong to the same party as the president. Judging from the results I would say that that tactic had some major flaws. So I thought it would be fun to look into the democratic playbook and pick the top ten strategies for pretending not to be a democrat:

10.  Tell everyone that the “D” after your name stands for “Dixie”

9.  Scatter “Romney/Ryan 2012” bumper stickers around the floor of your campaign bus.

8.  In every campaign ad, be sure to shoot something.

7.  President WHO?!

6.  Everyone who comes to a rally gets a free gun!

5. In every campaign speech mention Ronald Reagan.

4.  Promise to vote for a new war by the end of your first term.

3.  Castrate a pig.

2.  Castrate yourself (Oh, that’s right, your a democrat, you already did that!)

1.  If someone asks if you voted for President Obama, cough real loud, scream Ebola, and run out of the room.

Yes, running away from a president who gave us 55 straight months of job growth, a 150% rise in the stock market, and 20 million people access to medical care was truly inspired. As Jonathan Swift once wrote: “When a true genius appears, you can know him by this sign: that all the dunces are in a confederacy against him.” Well, dunces, I can’t wait to see what you and Chuck Todd have cooked up for 2016!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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