The Clown Car Update for September 14, 2014

Posted: September 14, 2014 in New Post

This week on Episode 309 of The Tim Corrimal Show the Clown Car features one of its favorite occupants, Sarah Palin and her band of merry offspring. As some background she and her husband Todd have a tradition of giving their children unusual names that have personal meaning. Their three daughters, Bristol, Willow, and Piper are named after a fish, a tree, and an inmate in the Netflix series, “Orange Is The New Black”. Their sons are named Track, for her poor track record of completing terms of office and Tripp, for what she does over every word in the English language. These are not to be confused with the Palin first cousins, Doc, Grumpy, Happy, Sleepy, Bashful, Sneezy, and Dopy.

Now apparently last Saturday the Palins were invited to the birthday party of a very prominent Alaskan snowmobile racer. Now as anyone who has a subscription to the Palin Network already knows, snowmobiling is the Palins’ third favorite activity after Moose gutting and inventing new words like “refudiate” and “misunderestimate”. Anyway, the entire brood pulled up in a stretch Hummer with a belly full of Jack Daniels and a trunk full of Real American Values. It was then that the altercation occurred. Track started the melee by brandishing a bottle of Wild Turkey and his middle finger at a former boyfriend of his little sister Willow. So you can understand his anger, in Alaska, your sister’s boyfriend is considered a romantic rival. So, trying to avoid trouble, the host intervened. That’s when Bristol, famous for clumsy dancing and having sex in the back of a Ford pickup, let go a flurry of punches. At this point Momma Bear Palin start screaming “do you know who I am”? When someone answered “Tina Fey?” she unleashed a barrage of four letter words, some of which were previously heard on election night 2008. All this culminated with the police being called to the scene to restore order. By this time Track had ripped off his shirt and was strutting about giving the bird to everyone in attendance and Sarah was demanding her speaking fee.

Now, on her Facebook page, Sarah denies ever being at the party and as for the cursing, she said the Holy Spirit often speaks through her in tongues. The police report tells another story, confirming that the Palins were present and that “Alcohol was believed to have been a factor in the incident”. However, those in attendance claim  the main motivator was stupidity and ignorance.

Incidentally, the DVD of the entire event can be pre-ordered on Amazon under the title “The Thrilla’ in Wasilla”.

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