Archive for June, 2014

From Episode 300 of The Tim Corrimal Show (you can listen here) is this week’s Clown Car Update:

Our clown of the week is Anne Coulter, who you would recognize as that right wing stick figure with a lump in her throat. Posing as a journalist, she attacks anything she perceives as liberal from the New Deal to broccoli. Her latest target? That most liberal of sports, soccer. Quoting her, “Any growing interest in soccer can only be a sign of the nation’s moral decay.”

Here are just three of her many complaints about the World Cup Conspiracy:

(1) Individual achievement is not a big factor in soccer. Apparently, it isn’t a big factor in journalism either, as is witnessed daily on Fox News.

(2) The prospect of either personal humiliation or major injury is required to count as a sport. Well, that would make her opinion column an ESPN Classic .

(3) It’s foreign, like the metric system, which liberals also adore because it’s European. Well I dislike the metric system, am not a huge fan of soccer, AND dislike Ann Coulter, so maybe there is some common ground here.

She concludes with “I promise you: No American whose great-grandfather was born here is watching soccer.” I can also promise Ms. Coulter that no American whose great-grandfather passed along a double helix to his offspring pays any attention to anything Ann Coulter has to say.

I’m not sure why Anne has such a fixation on soccer. Maybe her parent never held her enough. Maybe they held their soccer ball too much. Or maybe it was that unfortunate incident when she swallowed a soccer ball resulting in that ugly lump in her throat. Whatever the reason. it has landed Anne Coulter in the Clown Car spotlight this week.

Cheney-Speak

Posted: June 24, 2014 in New Post

As some of you may know, I have the privilege each week to co-host the Timcorrimal Show (Stitcher, iTunes, Netroots Radio). Each week I give an update on the GOP Clown Car occupants of the week. This week it was Dick and Liz Cheney for their video featuring a jaw-dropping rewrite of recent history.  If you have not had breakfast yet, you can watch it here. On this week’s show I offered the interpretation of the video translated from Cheney-Speak to English. I have been asked to post it, so here it is. Enjoy!

“Since I left office, President Obama has worked tirelessly to end the wars I started and return the troops to their families. Now, since my youth was dedicated to safeguarding my own ass from serving in the military, I have little interest in the troops or their families. What I do have an interest in is my bottom line which is starting to suffer from lack of war profit. Liz here was hoping to inherit my fortune, but if Obama keeps ending the wars I started, there may not be much left for her. As a result, we have started this new initiative, “The Cheney War Profit Fund”. In the past I have successfully lied to you about WMD’s, Iraq’s nuclear weapons, and even the ridiculous notion that I’m human. So, what the hell, I figured this was worth one more try! So how about it America, one more invasion for old time’s sake?!”